I forgot to celebrate my blog’s anniversary!
One year and 10 days ago, I decided to start a blog so I could express the things I didn’t want to say out loud to people in class who drove me bananas!
Here’s to one more year of being a giant bag of chicken-shit!
Happy Birthday Clown College Confessions! 🙂
I almost crapped myself when Rachel said she was doing a set about getting a Brazilian. I thought… IT’S GONNA BE TOO CLOSE! PEOPLE WON’T WANT TO HEAR WHAT I HAVE TO SAY! SHE’S WAY CUTER THAN ME!
Turns out, having a Brazilian wax and having your lady-lips ripped open on a bicycle are COMPLETELY different!
Phew.
Here’s what’s wrong with being a comedian:
When you have a BAD set:
“Oh, the audience was terrible, nobody got anything I was trying to say. The host such and such. And I think I’m going to quit forever.”
When you have a GOOD set:
“Oh, Yuk’s on a Humber night is a fake audience, and I didn’t really do that well. I forgot this and ahhh, I’m going to quit forever.”
You follow?
That being said, taking away all the negative thoughts and self-doubt, my set tonight at Yuk Yuk’s was probably the most fun I’ve had up there to date. I made kissy faces at a guy in the front row. I fake needle-stabbed some girls off to my right. I think it was the first time I felt tied-in with the audience, even though I was the last person up and sometimes people clock out WAY BEFORE the headliner. The audience was predominantly comprised of 1st year Comedy students and their friends. Although by the time I got up to headline the show, there were a lot of people present for the following non-Humber amateur show, the “Launch Pad,” which I will have to try to get on one of these days. They were super receptive!
I looked over to my left at one point and the people looked miserable.
But that’s focusing on the negative again.
Also, my opening wasn’t very strong. I got to do a big fat 7 minutes, and the opening was kindof ‘meh.’ Luckily, my bike accident saga made up for it.
The audience response was spectacular & I received compliments from strangers afterwards, Humber students and other. Compliments! I never got compliments from strangers telling me how good I was at booking reservations for tours of Rideau Hall. Well, actually, now that I think about it, I did receive a few of those. Toot toot. I’m down with Micaelle Jean.
It was fun to see all the first years perform their 2 minutes, scared shitless like I was just last year. It’s also fascinating to look back and see how significantly life has changed since last year, and even more since the year before that.
I wonder what will be in store this year…
But for now: BED. I have my first real day of work for Humber College’s Career Services tomorrow! Woot! 8:30 shift! I wish I had a car. (Mom, Dad… are you reading this?)
It has been a busy week. Most of the week was spent rehearsing and memorizing lines, leading up to LaughDraft‘s first live performance since our Launch Show back in June. All this, while trying to keep up with school work! You’ll be pleased to know that the show went very well!
The next day, I’d been offered a chance to check out a taping of the Ron James Show at the CBC building by my Sketch and Improv teacher, Robin Duke. I figured, though he’s not necessarily a comedian targeting my demographic, what the hell! Why not? It’ll be cool to see a live taping of a comedy TV show and I’ve never been to the studios at CBC, so shooo, let’s go for it.
As such, this blog entry will analyse certain of the differences between these two shows; the LaughDraft SEASON OPENER and the taping of two of the episodes in Ron James’ 3rd season with his own show on the CBC.
Ready?
OK.
The Venue
Have you ever been to the CBC building? That place is COOL! We were up on the 10th floor in a studio not unlike those I visited during my tour of NBC Studios in New York. The sound was crisp, the equipment was pro. The set was very cool. The air flow was very comfortable. The seats were nice. They had to bring more in to accommodate everyone who had come to the show that evening.
The Kapisanan Philippine Centre for Arts & Culture’s performance space is in a basement. The sound was muffled by a perpetual talk-radio background for some unknown reason, the mics, not strong enough. Some of the actors could not be heard at the back of the room. The equipment had just been installed that day. The lights, put up by our “crew” aka Joey, who had the day off. The air flow was, wait… what air flow? It was hot and humid as sweaty balls in there. The seats were from IKEA. If anyone else had come, they would have had to stand. The pipes were dripping on spectators and performers alike.
Advantage Ron James.
The Crowds
Upon arriving to the CBC building, there were many security guards who directed us to where we needed to go to pick up our tickets. Then we stood in a massive line in the CBC building’s main atrium? (Is it an atrium?) and waited for ushers (not-uniformed, I should specify) to bring us up the fancy scenic elevator, down the hall and to the left and finally to our seats in the studio. The joint was packed. Average age was probably 50ish. Get ready for jokes about people who don’t know how to use Twitter everybody!! Consistent laughter, even when RJ had to repeat the joke over and over again to get it right for TV. Which is weird. Imagine going to a stand-up show and hearing the comic tell the joke, and then come back at the end of the set and say: “OK, apparently I messed this one up or you guys didn’t laugh hard enough, so here we go again!” Stand-up would be an easier business if that were the case, methinks.
People drizzled into our show. There was no gigantic line-up. The outside was poorly lit, so I’m surprised people were able to find us in the first place (Thank you Paige and Ron for drawing the crowds in!) They’re just as good as ushers, and better looking at that! AND, they actually looked happy to be here! BUT people could go right in when they arrived. None of this standing around and herding people like sheep business. No, not for us. Although there was a bit of a cram as many of them in as possible like those evil chicken farms where they all poop on one another and get sick and stuff. Our venue had a nice amount of people in it, not completely packed, but just about. Average age, probably 22? (A much younger crowd than our Launch Show, which was interesting – Thank you first years!) Good laughter! Absolutely no chance for telling the same joke over again. If we fucked up or missed a line, we just kept going because we don’t have the luxury of an editing room. This is LIVE people! People actually got excited for our stuff though, it didn’t seem so generic, laugh here, clap here. I think there was a bit more surprise to our show. Not that stand-up monologues and sketches really compare in the kinds of laughter you get out of them, but still, ours felt good.
The Show
It was really cool to see a live taping of a television show and it was super cool that Ron James made a plea to get people to go check out live comedy. I guess he feels like he owes it to his brethren. He knows what it’s like to be working the circuit. He’s made it, it’s easy for him now. He has a team of writers, make-up, wardrobe, professional everything, GOVERNMENT FUNDING!
US? We had fun. We have the satisfaction of having put something together, worked our butts off at it, and performed. No network censors. No elaborate spending. Just pure, raw comedy!!! We’re just getting started. We’re at the opposite end of the career-spectrum as RJ, and it’s an exciting place to be.
Advantage LaughDraft.
Rehearsals for our upcoming LaughDraft show are going well and we’re set to get into the space for a cue-to-cue tomorrow. The only thing worrying me right now is that we won’t have as many people as we did at our first show, which was a huge success. The difference, this time, the money’s coming to US. The first show was a fundraiser for the Kapisanan Centre, but now, we’ve paid our dues to rent the place out and the rest is coming back to us, so we can continue to make videos and better content for our website.
This isn’t a plea to get people to come out to the show (well, maybe kinda) but it’s more an insight into my anxiety. What if we flop? I know we’ll just try again, but what if more people lose interest?
They shouldn’t, and I really shouldn’t worry, because the show’s going to be great. I know. I was at rehearsal. Now all we have to do is figure out how to end the show & we’re golden.
This post has nothing to do with Humber College’s Comedy program. This is simply a report of how I am spending my Saturday morning/afternoon.
I am currently on the hunt for two lost items, which I have not seen since I moved here in May, but which are vital in my returning to the gym. You see, I recently purchased a new pair of gym shoes (Nike… under $50, which is AMAZING! Go to the outlet store in Niagara Falls. Great deals! GREAT DEALS!!! AND… the swoosh is orange… ORANGE! Can you believe that?!)
Anyway, I’m one of those people who believe they need a certain set of things in order to work out to full satisfaction (ie. I’m lazy) and I’ve been avoiding the gym lately, despite the purchase of new shoes, because I cannot find my little iPod Shuffle (the one that’s great to bring to the gym) and my Dudley lock (because I can’t go to the gym without a lock. I’ll get my shit stolen. This is Humber Lakeshore, people. I’ve already had a credit card stolen from there. A credit card. Don’t worry, I got reimbursed)
So… I’m going to leave this post open throughout my cleaning day, and upon hopefully by the end of my cleaning journey I will have found those two missing items.
I’ll post other observations along the way. Such as:
1)Â I just threw out 5, count them, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 empty cartons of milk, all with “Best Before Dates” in August. Now, my friend Scott would remind me that it says: “Best Before” and not “Bad After,” but based on what I just threw down the toilet, these were all pretty “Bad After”.
2) They were not in my closet. Despite my assumption that I might have mistaken the metallic colour and weight of the lock as a tool and put it in my toolbox, alas, it was not there.
3) My exercise ball needs air. Big surprise.
4) HOW could I have not played catch/baseball/softball OR tennis all summer? This, is a tragedy! Anyone wanna throw a ball around before it gets too cold? (In other words, I found my baseball & tennis gear.)
5) HOLY SHIT! I have a lot of scarves!
6) I’ve looked through HALFÂ of my apartment and so far, NO LUCK… I think I’ll roll up some coins.
7) PROGRESS! I found my earbuds. They will be better to use when sweating than my new noise-canceling ones.
Break-time. I’m going to get lunch. Maybe the lock and iPod will magically hop out of their hiding spots while I’m away. *fingers crossed*
OK. So, nothing magically appeared while I was at the grocery store buying bread and maple cookies, so… back to the hunt!
8.  OH NO! I killed Che Guevara! I had a mini-statuette of him & Castro, which some asshole brought back from Cuba, but that I thought was awesome, so I still have it… well, until it fell of the shelf and shattered into hundreds of pieces. Oh well, so long Che. Way to fight the good fight! At least I still have your head.
9) 1st VICTORY!!!  I hath found my iPod Shuffle!!!!  It was in a basket filled with crap I’d meant to go through, eventually. YAY!!!! Step 1/2 COMPLETED!!! Oh, I’m so happy… Oh boy. Oh, this feels wonderful. Phew.
NOW… you might be thinking: “Why the plop doesn’t she just go out and buy a new lock!? What is she, a stupid-head?” OK, but ladies and gentleman, I have had this combination lock since my cadet days, all throughout high school and any time I’ve been to the gym after that. I remember the combination so well that if I got another lock, I would probably never remember the combination and embarrassingly ask Humber facilities management to take out the giant lock cutters and THEN, I’d have to buy ANOTHER lock… Do you see what I’m getting at people?
10) I found another basket of crap I was hoping maybe my lock would be hiding in. Sadly, it was not there. I did find a lot of fun useless junk, including my Empire Theatres name-tag and some 50-cent stamps. THOSE were the days!
11) I have now cleaned my entire “workstation”/ the area in my room where stuff most frequently piles up/gets lost. This is where I was most positive my lock would turn up, but alas, no sign of it yet. I’m beginning to lose hope…
12) I FOUND A BUNCH OF VHS tapes and got super excited, until I remembered I don’t have a VCR. Hey, does anybody have a VCR?
13) OK! The main room has been stripped and searched. All that’s left now is the kitchen *shudder* and the bathroom *double shudder*.
…
(6 hours later…)
OK, so I decided not to clean the bathroom and I only managed to get the dishes done in the kitchen BECAUSE I opted for making banana bread, grabbing dinner with Dan and watching hours worth of Breaking Bad…I know this is pretty anti-climactic, but… I’m pretty sure I lost the lock in the move, so good riddance 9-52-30. You’ve served me well. Maybe you’re at my parents’ place in Welland and I’ll find you in the basement one of these days, maybe not. Either way, I’ve just given myself an excuse to buy a new one with purple flowers on it. I LOVE FLOWERS!
Mmm… banana bread…
I’m gonna start completely accepting when people admit to being terrible people, assholes or jerks, instead of assuming they’re just using self-deprecation in an attempt to be charming. It will save me a lot of time down the line.
So much is happening at school!  Assignments already, readings and performances! It’s like… REAL school! How exciting!  In addition to that, there will apparently be some changes to the class roster, as a few students seem to want out of it (because it is apparently difficult to maintain a part time job with my section’s schedule) (and because some people want to leave the program flat out) and some people want in. Well, one person wants in. Either way, it’s only the beginning of the year and it’s buzz buzz buzz.
I also had my first encounter with student government today. I actually went to the Humber Student Federation (HSF) building (why would I otherwise?) (Oh wait, I think I did last year, I think that’s the K building, we did a show there…stand-up, it wasn’t bad.) ANYWAY, I digress. Apparently it’s as easy as saying:
Us: “Some of the students in the Comedy program are putting on a show and we’d like to put up some posters on campus to advertise.”
HSF: “No, no, no! Don’t you dare put those posters up.”
Us: “What? But why not?”
HSF: “Because we’ll do it for you! We’ll take all your posters and plaster them around campus. You don’t have to do any of the work. Aren’t you glad you elected us last year?”
Us: “Uh… yeah.”
HSF:Â “You did vote, didn’t you?”
Us: “Uh… so… you’ll put the posters up?”
HSF: Glaring…
…
“We sure will!! They’ll all be up by tomorrow! Have a splendid day!”
Us: “Thank you so much!”
Then I ran away.
******
Just kidding. I totally voted in last year’s student election. I don’t know who I voted for or what any of the students’ platforms were, but no big right? Just doing my civic duty as a student with rights on a campus where people take Comedy: Writing and Performance seriously as a program. Oh man. Thank God for that.
So we’ll have posters advertising our Sept 22nd LaughDraft show up all around campus! Isn’t that great, exciting and wonderful?
Well, I certainly thought so.
So, this probably isn’t a good thing, but most (every) nights I perform end with terrible headaches. I call them post-performance headaches (logically.) They’re like mini-migraines during which I become very sensitive to light. I feel like I should probably see a doctor about this, but I don’t want the doctor to be like: “Oh, you should never perform again, it’s bad for you!” Although, he (or she) might just say: “Go get your prescription updated.” and that wouldn’t be so terrible.
It’s either that, or I forget how to breathe the entire day leading up to a performance. Because, fuck breathing. Amirite?
SCHOOL TALK
I had my first Improv class of the semester and I’m looking forward to working with Robin Duke. It sounds like some of this pre-planned improv stuff (contradictory as it may seem) might be just the experience necessary to build a foundation for a show with a similar structure as It’s Always Sunny… or Curb…
It is also refreshing that Acting class is so positive this year. Today I played two new characters; a woman desperate to have a child, and a total bro. I find it strange I never really considered the “characters” I play on a regular basis. When asked if I have any “characters,” I said, not really. But I do… I’m reminded right now of the voice I use when pretending to be my mother… and that’s a really GOOD one! Anyway, CHARACTER is on my mind a lot lately.Â
SETS!
I had a great set at Yuk Yuk’s tonight. Older material, but it went over super well, so I’m glad about that. A friend of mine from high school and her sister were in the audience, so that was a lot of fun too. She can go back to Niagara and tell everyone I’m not as bad as my set at City Lights made me out to be.
As always, socializing post-performance left me feeling confused because a) I like socializing and b) I like Strongbow. However, it c) takes me a long time to get home and it’s starting to get cold out in the evenings which leads me to the fact that d) I need a car.
I’ll be performing new stuff tomorrow night at the friendliest room in town, Sirens. And I super-dee-dooper look forward to it!
NEW VIDEO UP!
If you haven’t already seen this, it’s the most recent LaughDraft News segment and this week’s a good one!! (They all are.)
You can check it out at: LaughDraft News – SEPTEMBER 9 2011
NEWS!!!!
Upcoming LaughDraft Show
The details have been confirmed with regards to our LaughDraft sketch show. If you’re in town on Thursday, Sept 22nd, you should definitely come on down and check it out.
Here’s our poster:
If you want to RSVP to the event, you can do so on Facebook at LaughDraft SEASON OPENER
That’s it for now! Comments encouraged!
You know how Zach Braff goes to that college party in The Last Kiss and it’s really awkward for him until he starts rubbing up against Rachel Bilson? Well, last Friday’s party was NOTHING like that at all. But it was a pretty damn good party. One of the problems with coming back to school, in a program so heavily dominated by people younger than I, is this aspect of socializing has sortof passed for me, so when it happens that I do attend a college party and I don’t feel like an old cow, or an awkward outcast, I feel like it must have been a damn good party.
Kindof like this guy:
I just watched the trailer for that movie and MAN did I get hit by a crap-ton of memories.  Remember Third Eye Blind’s How’s It Gonna Be? Yeah. Now YOU ride that wave of nostalgia along with me. It’ll be fun.
I performed a set tonight at bar where very few people attended and I tried out a few new little bits. We also met about our upcoming performance on the 22nd. I love being back into the flow of comedy things. My next four days are FILLED with not only school, but shows, performances and filming outside of school. I am a busy bee! Buzz buzz buzz.
OK, one more awesome 90s movie scene before I go to bed.
GOD! I miss my childhood.
Brie Watson 