Category: Clown College

“…is something wrong?  Are you not enjoying the program?  What’s wrong with you all?  Why aren’t you showing up on time?  Why are you skipping class?  How come you aren’t handing in your homework on time? You only have __ many of these classes left this semester, so at least try to show some enthusiasm.”

Some of us ARE doing it all, by the way…  Have you noticed?

It’s really discouraging to be grouped up with a bunch of people who aren’t holding their own when I’m up every freakin’ day, early as shit, to get either to school or to my part-time job on campus — on time!  I put in my hours, do my homework (of which the workload is significantly heavier than last year,) while simultaneously volunteering for comedy events around Toronto and being a very invested member of LaughDraft, time-wise, with its organization, its promotion and its creative content.  And I’m fine, thank you very much.

To be associated in the same light as someone who doesn’t show up on time ever, but who passes anyway because teachers feel bad giving them a failing grade, it’s insulting.  Why should I bother handing my stuff on time now, if I know I can get away with slacking hard?

You know why the second years are behaving like that?  Because you are LETTING THEM!

I sprained my ankle a lot growing up because I took dance lessons and wasn’t bestowed with the genetic gift of strong ankles.

Whenever I sprained it, I would take the tensor bandage from my father’s dresser.  It always smelled like his cologne.

I never really thought about until today when I bought a new tensor brace and sniffed it (out of habit.)

It was a sad moment when I realized the natural odour of a tensor bandage is not cologne-like in nature.

Great news!  I get to do more than perform for the Toronto Sketch Comedy Fest, I’m also now officially one of their 3 Humber student-interns.  I’ll be working on some social media updates, some organizing, some helping out here and there, and other exciting interny things!

Like the Comedy Awards, I’m glad Humber sets us up with these neat ways to meet & work with the big shots and little shots in the community! 😀

Check back often to see how this new adventure turns out!

Yay!

"Don't point that gun at him. He's an unpaid intern."

I’m excited about all this stuff happening for LaughDraft and I’m simultaneously frustrated.

There’s lots to be excited about.  For one, there’s the upcoming Halloween show at Comedy Bar:

 

This is exciting because:

  • Its’ the first time we perform at Comedy Bar;
  • It’s the first time Humber contributes to our troupe (Free Food, anybody?);
  • We’re performing ALL NEW sketches;
  • It’s Halloween!
  • One of my sketches got in;
  • We might make some money if enough people come, which will help us with future projects, etc.

We were also selected as the one troupe from Humber to be submitted into the Toronto Sketch Comedy Festival (which my class friends and colleagues are quick to point out is only due to the fact that we are currently the only performing-sketch troupe in the program so far this year.  To which I say: Default performance in SketchFest is better than no performance at all.)

Why this is exiting:

  • Two of the Kids in the Hall are performing in this festival. OMG!;
  • Other AMAZING sketch troupes are performing in this festival;
  • Our program coordinator at Humber, Andrew Clark, likes us enough to recommend us to the organizers;
  • We get to showcase 15 minutes of our best material to date (none of which was written by me… sigh.);
  • We get unlimited access to see all the shows in the festival;
  • Vest of Friends got to do it last year, and this year they might make it to Just For Laughs… just saying…;
  • Etc.

For everything there is to be excited about, it’s difficult because there are always some people ready to downplay the achievement, however meager it may be in our just-beginning careers and for what purpose?  I simply do not understand.  Are they still in that “it’s cool to be apathetic” stage?  Do they simply not want to be a part of this but feel obligated to stay on?  But again, for what reason?  I just don’t get it.

I wonder if it’s to do with the fact that I’m older.  Or  that apathy has naver been in my nature. I crave DOING.  I crave things to give a shit about!  Maybe it’s relative to what you put in.  I put a lot into LaughDraft, creatively and professionally.  I do a lot of the organizational aspects of it, I try to keep our meetings on track.  I often meet with Andrew to discuss Humber’s involvement and have done since the very beginning.  Because of that, I expect the same enthusiasm from all the others.  Here’s the problem.  It’s not them. It’s me.  Maybe I just have unrealistically high expectations. When something excites me, I expect it to excite the others in the group.  And it does some.  And others not.

And who cares, at the end of the day?  It’s no big deal.  But I do.  That’s the problem.

Here’s an insight into one of my most terrible jokes:

  • “The worst thing about attending a cancer party, is that you can’t complain about the food.  Sure you’re chicken may be rubbery, but that guy’s dying of fucking cancer!”

I don’t mean to mock anyone’s struggle with cancer.  It’s just that sometimes, it’s so hard to not to be able to do or say anything helpful or comforting, that just saying anything, even if it’s the opposite of comforting, helps me deal with such a heavy reality.

Last night’s Yuk’s was a ball!  Sadly, I’m stuck at home this evening memorizing a monologue & writing topical jokes, or I’d be out telling more jokes tonight.  This semester’s been busy.  I can tell this not only because of the amount of work I have due, but more visually, because my apartment is in an almost constant state of disorder.  In university, I used to clean my room as  a means of procrastinating.  Maybe I should get back into that habit, (instead of blogging to procrastinate.)

Yuk Yuk’s Humber Night – October 19 2011

This is how I get called up:

      “Your next comedian is, um… Brie Watson.”

Technically, she got it right. Yes I was next, and that is in fact my name.  But how about a little oomph please?  I walk up on stage to that and the crowd already thinks I’m going to bore them to death.

But I get up on stage and couldn’t be happier about the fact that the three people in the front row, off to the side, look like celebrities.  More specifically, they look like a blonde Justin Bieber, the bearded-guy from Modern Family (but not a red-head) and a less-coked-out Courtney Love.  Bringing this information to the audience was one of those moments I’ve heard Larry refer to as: “A gift from the comedy gods.”   Just a moment when something comes up and you just KNOW it’s going to be good and it’s going to resonate well with the crowd.  And it DID.  Which is GREAT! Because I was going up with all new material and I was worried the set would be garbage!

But this guy was blonde.

God!  I just re-listened to it.  I HATE re-listening to my sets.  The second half of it WAS garbage, I stumbled so many times.  Gotta tighten it up, that’s all.  Tighten it up.  I wonder what Larry thought of it.  I LONG FOR HIS APPROVAL.

AND for Andrew Clark’s.  That’s why I talk so freakin’ much in his class. LOVE ME, ANDREW!  Get me a gig with Breslin when I graduate this place!! Don’t send me back to Ottawa, I don’t want to go back there! I can’t do it!  I just can’t!! (Unless it’s to do gigs at Yuk Yuk’s! In which case, SEND ME BACK TO OTTAWA!! PLEASE!)

The gay dude from Modern Family!!

I think I’m starting to crack under all this pressure.

No not really.

Havin' a good day.

 

Two weeks in and we’ve finally begun actually doing stuff, as opposed to sitting around hearing about what we’re going to be doing,  in the program and in life as successful and/or failed comics.

We’re already working on some cool assignments.  One of which is the memorization of a monologue, to be performed in my Acting and Voice class.  As many of you may know, a childhood filled with too many hours spent watching television and with the advent of modern instant communication, I probably have the worst capacity to retain and memorize just about anything.  So, this has been a fun little challenge.  I picked something out of Clerks.  (The first one…the good one.)  I felt like I wouldn’t have a hard time getting into Veronica’s character and that it would be a fitting role to play as a result.   I’d originally planned on doing something out of Juno, but I felt that monologue was too short.  Juno has plenty of lengthy voice-overs, but that’s about it.  So, Kevin Smith it is.

I’m also working on putting together one-minute’s worth of Stand-Up material for my Stand-Up class. I’m finding it exceptionally challenging to sit down (ayuk) and write jokes.  I guess the source of my humour has for a long time come out in the form of rants, which are not jokes, but rather long, drawn-out lists complaints about the state of this or that.  The format of a joke is much different.  Anyway, I’ve worked on something and I’ll just need to rehearse it before class on Tuesday. I’ll let you know how it goes!

I’ll leave you with one of the most important debates of our time.  (Also from Clerks.)  If you haven’t seen this movie yet, let this clip and others you find on YouTube be the motivation you need to check it out:

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls:

I am pleased to be writing to you from this new blog site, where from now on, I intend to keep anyone interested updated in the adventures of my new life as a comic-in-training in the big city.

I’ll also keep anyone informed about any shows I’ll be playing throughout the year.  I have nothing lined up for now, but it both pleases and frightens me to death to know that within the next few weeks, I’ll have performed my own stand-up material at Yuk Yuk’s, here in Toronto.

Let me know what you think, and feel free to ask any questions.

I’ll remain short and to the point for now, but know that my first few weeks in the Comedy program at Humber have been eye-opening and I look forward to sharing my experience with you.